Now onto the topic at hand.

I think the idea that the attitude behind the existence of hymenoplasties is prevalent in modern western society is sickening. Don’t we live in advanced-enough nations where women can be measured by what’s between their ears rather than what’s between their legs? But no…

I didn’t like losing my virginity, I didn’t like bleeding, but subsequent sexual encounters, I did like. Why the hell are women wanting to go through the painful stuff again just to fulfill a patriarchal ideal?

That being said, I can understand the mindset of a woman in a NON-western, NON-advanced nation who knows that her non-virginal status could mean she would be shunned or killed. Did anyone else read Khaled Hosseini’s A Thousand Splendid Suns, where the (non-virginal and pregnant) Laila cut herself after sex with her new husband so that he’d think she was a virgin and not punish or kill her? Going through painful surgery has got to be better than getting killed–although living in a world where there are better options should be the real goal.

I have a penis
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Just my two balls
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Why continue to use any concept that lumps people together in large groups
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For such a stalwart opponent to the notions of sex and gender, you sure are set on us knowing exactly what reproductive organs you’re brandishing.

I’m not complaining, it certainly saves us time in sorting out your underlying attitudes, but I’m just wondering what you get out of it?

BUT, I think its strange when ‘women’s liberators’ come down harshly on practices of other women. If a woman wants her hymen reconstituted, so what? Why should we construct new modes for people to be, prescribe new modes for women, men, whoever, instead of just letting them be what they want?

Just my two balls…i mean cents…

Or, as the last comments says, ‘our gender.’ Why continue to use any concept that lumps people together in large groups, so that then you can prescribe behavior for them? Prostitutes are bad for women? Maybe its bad for them, maybe its good. But I think most people are smart enough to tell the difference between a prostitute and other women–that they don’t reflect the behavior, goals, abilities, etc. of all those who share their ‘gender.’

[Moderator note: this poster's gravatar has been modified for our amusement]

- The religious aspect disgusts me. I feel sorry for women who are forced to do this because they are punished for not being “proper” virgins.

- As far as rape vitcims go, honestly I don’t think that it is the physical sensation of losing their virginity that they want to experience again with the person they truly want (I’m pretty sure most women would agree that losing their virginity was not their favorite physical experience) but it is the sense of power that they have in “giving” it, if you will, to the person they feel deserves it – in their case it was taken from them, without permission, and in the most horrible way. I can see why restoring their hymen would give them that sense of power back.

- Breaking your hymen on accident (i.e. horseback riding, athletics, etc.) is outside of our control, if it means that much to the person to be able to lose her virginity the way she wants to, then the more power to her, because she is giving herself that power.

- As for the rest, I think “losing” it again on your 20th anniversary completely loses meaning considering you “lost it” 20 years before – I don’t see how doing it again is celebratory of your time together, I think that’s kind of messed, actually – I feel that would be more of the husband’s fetish there than mutual celebration. For the “Ladies of the Night,” instead of criticizing them for getting a hymen restoration, why not be getting pissed about their lifestyle and how that reflects on our gender? I think their hymen restoration issues come second to that.

Sorry for the rant, I was intrigued.

i remember my first time we had to stop halfway through because it hurt her too much…. wasn’t too comfortable for me either, really. there’s no way in hell i’d ever want to go through that again, and i’m a guy fer chrissake. like seraph and others have said, pain is not sexy. if somebody’s getting hurt then there’s something wrong, and anyone that’d pay big money for an operation whose sole purpose is to hurt them and make them bleed during sex needs to have their f*cking head examined.

so not cool.

Moderator Note: this comment has been disemvoweled

this is not news to me. rehymenization surgery has even been referred to as “saving” women from violent retribution doled out by angry husbands whose wedding nights do not involve bloody sheets.

what has me most furious is the ongoing assumption that women are chattel, as indicated by the use of the word “conquest” — ya know, like land gets conquered through war?

Andrea Dworkin was so right — women’s bodies are a war zone.