Well, surprise me cunt!
“We’ve hit the G spot, say scientists”. Yet another Italian science team has added to the body of “knowledge” by claiming that some women have G-spots and some don’t.
Emmanuele Jannini writes about developing a “clinical test” for the presence or absence of a G-spot. Soon, ham-fisted blokes will be able take their frigid chicky-babes down to the clinic for an intravaginal ultrasound if they don’t seem to be adequately satisfied with a few strokes of the magnificent meat-pistol. Rate your woman, for only $89.95 plus GST.
If the tissue is thicker on the front side of the vagina, a woman gets a big G-spot tick. If not, ba-bowwww! No G-spot, honey, so no fun for you. Just lie back and think of England. Has no one read Koedt’s Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm?
As Professor Whipple of Rutgers notes, the study only examined 20 women. Women report that their G-spot tends to swell when they are aroused. Random ultrasounds tell you nothing, except that some women aren’t turned on by a strange chap in a dark-filled room wielding a plastic-wrapped ultrasound probe.
It doesn’t seem to have occurred to anyone to, y’know, talk to actual women. Touch caringly, and find out what feels good. No, we need a machine that goes ping, so that we can claim that we now have objective measurements of women’s pleasure, and a classification system that categorises half of us defective. I predict that expensive “therapies” will be on the market within twelve months. New Scientist continues:
…ultrasound could be used to test whether a woman has a G spot or not.
If [it] does, it may even be possible to increase its size using testosterone, which both the clitoris and Skene’s glands can respond to. This could increase sexual responsiveness, but could be dangerous in women with normal testosterone levels. Jannini is running a trial in post-menopausal women and those who have experienced early menopause to see if testosterone treatment can increase the size of the G spot as measured by vaginal ultrasound.
Because that’s what’s wrong with frosty women who refuse to orgasm! Not enough testosterone! Not only are they anatomically broken, they’re hormonally-challenged by their very femaleness.
Maybe next they’ll invent a device to find the clitoris. Make it vibrate, and everyone wins.