Marry, Shag or chuck off a Cliff: Boots of Revenge & High Adventure edition

aka the Knocking Boots edition, hrarf-hrarf. It’s been more than a month since the last Marry, Shag or Cliff! For this edition we are revisiting some posts I made nearly two years ago now, regarding some of the cheesier celluloid adventures of decades gone by and the fabulous boots involved therein.

Conan, Flash Gordon, or our Errol as The Seahawk?

Xena (related warrior-woman post), Barbarella, or Uhura?

So – which character’s boots would live in your wardrobe, whose boots could could you pop under your bed for a night, and whose boots would you steal before heartlessly cliffing them? As usual, discussing alternate suggestions for the trilemma, mixing and matching, dissing casting decisions and general booted smut is encouraged. There are some bonus boot pics over the fold.

Now, this time I decided to spare you Sean Connery’s thigh boots from Zardoz without warning, but if you really must, here you go. (It’s not the boots that are actually the problem, it’s the rest of his outfit).

Here’s some bonus Xena screencaps:

I had to struggle with Flynn: I would have shown Robin Hood’s boots in the main shot if I could have found a better quality image, but I don’t have it in my heart to deprive you of the green tights entirely, and you might as well have a bonus Seahawk in-the-rigging shot as well.

To finish, some shots with no (gasp!) boots at all! But you just know that Tarzan would have had killer boots if he could have found some, and I have to (just must) include the Tarzan shots to make sense of the final cheesy publicity photo below. For those unaware, Olympic swimming champion Buster Crabbe played Tarzan in serials before his increasing girth meant that he had to move on to the more covered-up Flash Gordon, and then came the hit Tarzan movies with Olympic swimming champion Johnny Weismuller.

This final shot is of Crabbe and Weissmuller arm-wrestling, all Tarzanily bare-chested, and was part of a series of trading cards handed out at matinee cinema sessions in the UK.

How absofuckinglutely cheesetastic. You just don’t see publicity shots like that any more.

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• Friday Hoyden: Diana Rigg as Emma Peel by tigtog
• This week, Whoydnesday is all about the Companions by tigtog
• Marry, Shag, Cliff: Classic ER by Lauredhel
• Marry, Shag or Cliff: Inaugural Whodnesday Edition by tigtog
• Dangerous Deppths by tigtog

Tagged as: barbarella, boots, buster crabbe, conan, flash gordon, gratuitous ogling, johnny weismuller, knocking boots, marry shag or cliff?, seahawk, thigh boots, trilemma, uhura, warrior woman, weissmuller, xena, zardoz