The Unilever Files: Still Wishing That Girls Were More Like Pot Noodle

by Lauredhel on October 29, 2008

in consumerism, ethics & philosophy, gender & feminism, social justice

Via The F-Word: this Pot Noodle advertisement is back.

You’ll NEVER GUESS what company makes this. Unilever.

Hard to believe, I know. They have no history of bigoted advertising at all, do they?

Lyrics:

I wish that girls were more like Pot Noodle
Oh if they only came in a pot
Farewell to guilt trips, nagging and random tantrums
If she lived in a cupboard things wouldn’t be so tough
Our love would be sweeter oh baby, if she only came with the salty stuff.

I wish that girls were more like Pot Noodle
Freeze-dried and quick and done in a jiffy
[bring me simplicity]
So raise your forks and raise something simple, easy and more hassle free.

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Tagged as: advertisement, bigotry, cupboard, f word, farewell, food/drink, girls, gratuitous ogling, guilt trips, hassle, jiffy, lyrics, oh baby, peeves, pot noodle, sexism, simplicity, tantrums, unilever

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This article was written by lauredhel

Lauredhel is a forty-something woman with a disability. She lives in her Western Australian family home where books, Lego, and soapmaking gear constantly compete for space. She blogs about feminism, reproductive justice, freedom from violence, the use and misuse of language, medical science, being disabled, her vegetable garden, and whatever else pops into her head. Lauredhel also blogs at FWD/Forward (feminists with disabilities), scribbles at her personal dreamwidth journal Selective and Arbitrary, and co-moderates Hollaback Australia. She joined Hoyden About Town in 2007.

lauredhel has written 1286 posts for Hoyden About Town. If you liked this post, you might like to subscribe to the feed via RSS or EMAIL to get instantly updated for more posts like this.

{ 1 trackback }

I just called to say…go fuck yourself « Fuck Politeness: October 29, 2008 at 11:46 am

{ 8 comments }

1 Fine October 29, 2008 at 10:34 am: What the hell is a pot noodle? Don’t these guys get anything at all? Like what century it is?
2 fuckpoliteness October 29, 2008 at 10:50 am: Ah, haven’t we ALL wished that we women were more like nutritionally devoid, tasteless psuedo-food at some point? We’re just so needlessly *complex* with our irritating tendancy to complicate things by way of not living in cupboards, and breathing, thinking, talking, laughing, telling dickhead men and Unilever to go fuck themselves. In the spirit of generosity though, perhaps we could have the roles reversed:
“Oh I wish that *I* were pot noodle Soup
Farewell to being mocked and demeaned
Tortured and raped
Farewell to debates on my sexuality
and my right to choose when and how and if I parent
Farewell to putting up with dickheads
Who think their self absorption
Their idiocy and social ineptness
Their put-downs, their belching, their ballscratching and leering
Are fine
But my raising my voice when angry means I’m crazy
I really wish I was a pot noodle soup
Some peace
Some quiet
Not having to fight for respect
or for my opinion to be heard
Not having to fear for my safety whenever a human with a penis wanders past and I feel vulnerable
If women were pot noodle soup
Does this mean men would want to fuck a bowl of noodles?
Or shall we finally be left to get on with our lives
As they apparently should be:
Silent
Brainless
For consumption
And male satisfaction
Kept locked up for when the urge strikes?
Oh – AM I pot noodle soup?
Unilever has confused me”
(As you can see poetry is not my thing, but hell in comparison with Unilever’s ditty I’m going ok)
3 Sophie October 29, 2008 at 10:53 am: Pot noodle: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pot_Noodle
Instant noodles cooked with hot water plus flavouring, requires no actual cooking or washing up.

You know, with only a change of slogan that ad could be a (very sexist) promotion for prostitution…
4 Deus Ex Macintosh October 29, 2008 at 6:50 pm: Pot Noodles are instant noodle pots similar to Suimin, except I LIKE Suimin and pot noodles are foul.
5 Zoe October 29, 2008 at 7:22 pm: Judging by unilever’s horrid Dove products which those duffers sent me, they also think girls should smell just like those little “deodorising” trees that people hang in their cars.
6 Deus Ex Macintosh October 29, 2008 at 7:26 pm: Could be worse – they launched a ‘Spring Fresh’ version of their Bold 2-in-1 washing powder/fabric softener combo a few years back in the UK. Pity they chose the same perfume you find in Raid insect repellent in Australia.
7 Lauredhel October 29, 2008 at 7:29 pm: they also think girls should smell just like those little “deodorising” trees that people hang in their cars.

Cigarettes and pine oil? Mmmm.
8 Rayedish October 29, 2008 at 7:53 pm: What is that ad even for?