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Lauredhel is an Australian woman and mother with a disability. She blogs about disability and accessibility, social and reproductive justice, gender, freedom from violence, the uses and misuses of language, medical science, otters, gardening, and cooking.

This author has written 1550 posts for Hoyden About Town. Read more about Lauredhel »

25 responses to “Missing The Point Awards, Manchester poster edition”

  1. rayedish

    “Early sexualisation of kids is wrong” yes it is. But that’s certainly not what’s going on here. And they say England has a reputation for not being child friendly, I can’t think where that’s come from.

    Ahh, kids pretending to breastfeed. Its only as normal as kids walking around in Mum’s shoes. Which is to say, its totally fracking normal. What’s wrong with you people?

    The postcard – gorgeous.

  2. Mindy

    Dammit, I knew that I forgot to forward the memo. You should know that “Boobies are for teh sexes now, not for teh feedz”. Ok, are we all on board with this? Any child, male or female pretending to feed a dolly will be taken as evidence of inappropriate sexualisation of children. And what is a boy doing with a doll anyway? Girls feeding dollies with bottles will be taken as evidence of them learning to be good little mothers. /sarcasm

  3. Zoe

    You know what? Both of my sons have been enthusiastic breastfeeders of toys. The youngest, nearly 2 1/2 has been so polluted by my prolonged breastfeeding of him that he likes to pretend I’m feeding the toys as well. Sleepy cat is a particular fan of “lala”.

    But here’s the shocking bit – his father and I have been known to hold him down on the floor and nom him on the boobal area JUST BECAUSE IT’S FUN! At least that’s what you’d guess from his hysterical laughter, if you didn’t know Teh Psychological Damage that was occurring.

  4. Ouyang Dan

    I remember that I used to pretend to breastfeed my dolls when I was playing house w/ neighbor kids. It never occurred to me to use a bottle b/c everyone in my family breastfed primarily, and bottles were used only if someone had to go somewhere. I remember the neighbor kids freaking out and telling me that I had best not let their mom see me, and I remember I could not figure out for the life of me why they would worry about this.

    Stayed w/ me. I was well known to answer the door w/ baby in arm who still had breast in mouth. I routinely fed wherever/whenever, and fed and pumped at the same time often, at our kitchen table when Baby and I live w/ my grandparents. The outrage over this seems so silly to me, b/c I grew up thinking that it was default to breastfeed. It wasn’t until I met The Kid’s bio father that anyone implied I should do otherwise. He was gonna “let” me breastfeed for a couple of days, but that was it, see, b/c he didn’t want anyone else playing w/ “his” boobies. There is a reason that relationship didn’t survive the first trimester.

  5. sister suffragette

    Hell- I don’t know a child who does NOT breastfeed his or her toys.

  6. Deborah

    FFS! I’m just flabbergasted by this. I breastfed my dolls, my daughters breastfed theirs, even the younger two who haven’t seen women breastfeeding much because we just haven’t been around babies and toddlers much (dunno how things worked out that way, but they just did). It’s NORMAL, and it’s DESIRABLE. That is, both breastfeeding in the first place, and children breastfeeding their dolls.

  7. shonias.blogspot.com/

    Oh FFS. My boys breastfed their dolls on occasion too.

    In all the time I was breastfeeding in public, it never occurred to me anyone could be viewing it as a sexual act. That is weird in the extreme.

    I’ve seen my kids role play parents having arguments, at least breastfeeding is a good example I was setting. :)

    shonias.blogspot.com/’s last blog post..Is consent a furfy?

  8. tigtog

    I guess the reaction does show the need for the poster in the first place – way too many people do think that this isn’t normal.

  9. danni.dreamwidth.org/

    I distinctly remember breastfeeding my doll. I assume if my parents thought it was weird, it’s because they were raising me as a boy.

    Though reading some of the comments above, this might actually have been quite normal regardless of my future gender identity (I’m told, and accept, that many young boys play with dolls before society has conditioned them and that it is not considered an indicator of gender variance).

  10. hexy

    Wow. I… honestly don’t understand the outrage. I’m genuinely baffled.

    I don’t think I ever breastfed dolls, but I’m a youngest child.

    hexy’s last blog post..SEX WORKERS TO OPEN NEW ORGANISATION IN QUEENSLAND

  11. Linda Radfem

    I sure hope all these outraged brits are there protesting the availability of leopard print push-up bras in the Lil Miss section.
    That this is automatically seen as “sexualisation” is nothing but a social indicator. Women and girls are sex, nothing more.

    Like everyone here, I could rattle off a million anecdotes about children breastfeeding dolls and toys and never once have I ever witnessed an adult respond negatively to it.

  12. DeusExMacintosh

    Maybe as well as the “IT’S NOT SEX, IT’S RAPE” graphic you need one for “IT’S NOT SEXUAL, IT’S BREASTFEEDING”.

    DeusExMacintosh’s last blog post..Hoist by his own canard

  13. whizz for atoms

    God – this just made me depressed to be British. So depressing given the ridiculously low levels of breast feeding in Britain and the constant bad press indicating that it is somehow “shameful”.

  14. tigtog

    @ DeusExMacintosh:

    what a great idea:

    Share as you will.

  15. MomTFH

    Ridiculous. I am amazed what people choose to react against.

    My younger son used to rpetend to give “num nums” to his toy airplane. It was normal and adorable.

  16. Helen

    Just… Gahhhh!!!

    Wizz for Atoms, I heart your nickname also.

  17. bluemilk.wordpress.com/

    There are some charming photos of my partner as a little boy breastfeeding his toy monkey.

  18. rozasharn.livejournal.com/

    I think I may have figured out where the “early sexualization of kids” reaction is coming from. See, young girls really do feed babies with bottles. I never realized before, but I process those images as “child helping take care of younger sibling”. So a child bottle-feeding a doll looks like a straightforward representation of something they could do for real at that age.

    In that framework, a child with a doll half-under her shirt seems to suggest a child breastfeeding now, having given birth and had a sexual history while still in preschool. Hence the squick.

    With my reasoning mind I can classify it as role-playing adulthood, just like wearing toy firefighters’ helmets or driving toy cars. But if you’ve never seen a child play at breastfeeding before, your subconscious may process it through the wrong framework. And I hadn’t ever seen a child do that before, even though I and my younger siblings and cousins were breastfed. Luck of the draw, I guess.

  19. hander

    “and the country is abuzz.”

    Please! This is a small reaction from some people in Britishland – not indicative of the whole country’s attitude towards breastfeeding/toddlers playing at breastfeeding/etc.

    As any fule kno, there are a lot of people in this country – many of whom would smile or not think twice about this poster.

  20. tigtog

    The UK’s Daily Mail has picked up the story and mis-cited Hoyden About Town in the process: [link] – they have quoted Lauredhel’s quotation of a contributor to Rochdale Online (… the sort of picture that a paedophile would show a kid…) as if the statement came from a contributor here. Daily Fail yet again.

  21. rozasharn.livejournal.com/

    Lauredhel wrote: “That’s what your conscious is for, I reckon. ”

    Agreed. I wasn’t trying to excuse anything, just tracking down the origin of the response.

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