If i organise a conference, then you’re gonna stick to our rules. In our conference there are no rape jokes by speakers allowed. This isn’t a restiction on anyone’s free speech – they can go organise their own conference, and i’ll express my disgust at their special “rape jokes allowed” conference.

But that brings me back to the actual topic, with one of those examples:

Questioning someone’s sanity because their opinion differs from your own.

That ones pisses me off so bad every time.

My own position was initially more closely aligned with Jemima’s, but receiving the comment notifications from FF101 regularly in my mailbox makes me appreciate your point quite viscerally. I hope for support for the arguments I’m making, and am often confronted with vitriol instead, and it is a burden.

Shelby, like any other new commenter, is still Schrödinger’s Troll for me – I don’t know what will be found when/if the box unfolds, and until it is fully open I am wary. Especially when other signs appear to point to the undesirable result. Could those signs be a coincidence, and not necessarily The Mark of The Troll? Of course. But I do not apologise for being wary of Schrödinger’s Troll, just as I am wary of Schrödinger’s Rapist, Schrödinger’s Racist, Schrödinger’s Fat-Hater and all the rest.

Still, though, comments delivered in my Inbox can still be left unopened for days. I don’t know what mail program/site you’re using obviously, but if I’ve concluded that comments on a specific blogpost will be potentially hurtful, then I can still leave them in my Inbox for a time when I feel ready to deal with the crap – or not deal at all and just delete them. Admittedly it took me quite a while to learn that I did not owe anyone my attention, but that’s not everyone else’s fault.

Of course things overlap, and while it is their fault that they’re being hurtful, it’s not their fault that I choose to read anyway. If it was the first comment and it caught me by surprise, yes, then there was nothing I could have done, and it’d be their fault. But if it was the third comment, and I could see where it was going, and then contrary to better judgment going back to read more, then it’s me ruining my day. They’re still being jerks (or maybe they’re not, depending on who’s being the self-entitled one) and that doesn’t change, but as long as I have every chance in the world to not expose myself to their presence, I can’t really blame them alone for ruining my day. Same reason I don’t show up to nazi-meetings and other racist bull. It’ll ruin my day or even week/month, so I stay away.

Shelby was well aware that it would ruin her mood to hang out here – she stated so herself – and yet she returns on the same day Nov 13th and then accuses everyone here of ruining her day, when it would have been easy for her to simply stay away like she said she would.

Unless of course she has something akin to a compulsion, in which case we’re talking about something entirely different.

Back to the topic: People who work in the child care profession and talk about children who have been sexually abused as a huge inconvenience to you.
Hey areshole, get the fuck away from my kids!

Check.