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tigtog (aka Viv) is the founder of this blog. She lives in Sydney, Australia: husband, 2 kids, cat, house, garden, just enough wine-racks and (sigh) far too few bookshelves.

This author has written 3449 posts for Hoyden About Town. Read more about tigtog »

11 responses to “Femmostroppo Reader November 5, 2010”

  1. QoT

    *dies of squee*

  2. tigtog

    Squee yourself! I thought you and Pickled Think both made t’riffic responses to Fry’s belated acknowledgement of the whole mess, too.

    I get that he meant to be just goofing off around other gay guys, I really do. That’s one of the things that’s so disappointing about the tired old tropes he used to do so in the process – he would never have dreamed of saying anything so ridiculous if there’d been women in the room, so why is it supposed to be OK that he thought it was OK to say it when there weren’t?

  3. lauredhel

    Ah. Stephen Fry’s “Silliness” post. It seems to me that one of the least suitable ways to respond, when women are talking about you displaying some eensy teensy gender issyews, is to invite your readers to compared your giving print interviews to their being raped.

  4. tigtog

    And of course, the problem with his self-congratulatory “I don’t read what people say about me on the Internet” stance is that he hasn’t even allowed himself to appreciate that his rubbish was so trivialising towards the fully justifiable concern that women have about any scenario where they are on their own in a dark park, whether the park is full of sexy SNAGs, chocolate smorgasbords or Jimmy Choo sales (to go the stereotype trifecta).

  5. QoT

    @tigtog: Thanks! I think the whole “just talking to other gay guys” thing hit a lot of my buttons, because I *love* thinking about how we modify our language or tone or opinions for different audiences – but the activism centre of my brain still insists that there are lines that just shouldn’t be crossed, because crossing them in one set of circumstances just makes it easier to cross it in others.

    And of course while I realise that not everyone’s an overly-analytical cynic-feminist like myself, it just continues to baffle me that apparently parroting classic, cliched notions about women is somehow meant to obviously be parody. I mean, come on, Stephen, even some of your fans were defending you on the horribly offensive basis that “bipolar made him do it”, not “it was clearly in jest”.

    @lauredhel – I managed to miss that bit! But on re-reading I feel entirely smug to see Fry repeating the “well I’m gay, I can’t POSSIBLY know about women’s urges” directly after playing the “some of my best friends are women” card.

  6. tigtog

    come on, Stephen, even some of your fans were defending you on the horribly offensive basis that “bipolar made him do it”, not “it was clearly in jest”.

    Don’t forget the ones who were defending him on the basis of “but he’s absolutely right and you just can’t compete with his giant intellect”.

  7. eli

    @lauredhel

    I completely shut down after that line. I officially don’t give a fuck about anything Stephen Fry has to say anymore. I wonder if he has a publicist or a friend standing by on the sidelines screaming “You’re making it worse!!!”

  8. orlando

    I’m trying to think of any reason Fry would have re-tweeted Boganette’s line the way he did, besides that he knew she would get dumped on, and that’s what he intended. At this point I can’t think of one, and I find that really disturbing.

    The “playing with an idea” line was pretty disingenuous from someone of his known inventiveness. He must know that repeating the status-quo line verbatim is neither a riff nor a subversion.

  9. tigtog

    It wouldn’t entirely surprise me if Fry is in the habit of broadcasting links that people send to him when it’s an article about himself without paying too much further attention to the content of the article so long as he knows it’s one he actually did do an interview for. Perhaps he just did what he usually does with such links, and this time that blase thoughtlessness came back to bite him. Of course I don’t know whether my hypothesis here is true, it’s just that I do see it as a plausible non-malicious construction of his action, and I don’t generally think that he is a malicious person.

    The problem was that she was asking him to confirm/deny that he’d been correctly quoted, and he didn’t bother to do so before broadcasting the link. Perhaps if he had been paying more attention he would have actually thought about her question, reread the interview, and responded a bit more appropriately.

    Or not. Maybe he still would have been in brainfart mode.

  10. Amanda

    Ohhh, Hoyden love! :D Ty Tigtog :)

    If “some of his best friends are women” I’m trying to imagine what some of them might be saying:

    Emma Thompson: *ET exasperated voice* “Oh STEPHEN…”
    Judy Dench: *firm M type voice* “STEPHEN!”
    Helen Mirren: *menacing, low Mirren voice* “Steeeephen…”

  11. tigtog

    Don’t forget Jo Brand. She’s not one for just doing a gentle eye-roll.

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