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blue milk also writes for The Guardian and Fairfax publications. You can read more about her at her own blog, blue milk.

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  1. Perla
    Perla at |

    *TW: Food and eating issues*

    Thank you for the link. I think I’m getting better at rejecting the “moral” messages around food, but I just recently had a conversation with a friend/ex about my plan to start baking again.

    Me:“I’m going to cook stuff like cassava cake and sticky rice, so I can justify it for cultural reasons”.
    Him: “Justify what? To who?”

    The notion that I have to justify partaking in an activity I really enjoy just because I usually end up eating something at the end of it is really messed up.

  2. Keira
    Keira at |

    Thanks for the link, I can always use a reminder.

    Food guilt and body shame was basically a sport on my mother’s side of the family, especially at christmas, with Nan, aunties, and cousins all lining up to compare who is getting fat, who isn’t what everybody ate, etc.

    And for all that, there was also pressure never to be “too thin”, constant discussion about who had or had not “filled out” etc. And don’t forget the “nice people don’t eat seconds of dessert” (i still don’t understand this, as if eating the sweets over three days is actually different to finishing it in one).

    Mostly I think people meant well, and wanted to bond over shared body-misery, but it totally sucked and lead to internalised self-hatred all round.

    Perla, I totally understand, I Bake, too, and it can really suck when guilt gets in the way of an enjoyable hobby (also, I don’t know about you, but I hate it when I cave and then realise I have wasted my baking efforts and expensive vanilla on not-so-great healthier versions).

    If you haven’t seen it yet, check out the No Diet Talk stuff at Definatalie. Well timed indeed.

  3. Perla
    Perla at |

    Thanks tigtog and Keira. I’m always looking for more fashion and size acceptance inspiration!

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