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12 responses to “He’s talking about his bank balance, right?”

  1. Lauredhel

    Eyeroll. Some of the solidest evidence associates longevity with breakfasts and fruit’n'veg. (Also dental care, wearing a seatbelt, sleeping enough, etc.) But none of these will shrink you short term like a fad crash diet will.

    From the Amazon blurb: “broccoli carbs can be worse than those from Coke.” *snort*

    He also recs a cold bath first thing in the morning. HAHAHAHA no.

    Marianne Kirby tackled the “Get skinnier than all your friends” tagline here in the Guardian.

  2. Tori

    You know, cutting off my left leg would also cause me to lose a lot of weight. It would, strictly speaking, achieve results (and probably fatal blood loss).

    Somehow, I think that instead, I will finish my glass of water, take a shower, and continue to not give a fuck.

  3. Perla

    TW: medical fail, body shaming, dieting etc.

    Any “lifestyle plan” that involves cutting fruit and broccoli out is not for me! I haven’t been this perturbed about a new diet since that anaesthetist started campaigning for people to cut out fruit, lest they show up on his operating table with signs of adipose tissue!

    (for a refresher: http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/fruit-cops-a-bruising-20111105-1n1fa.html)

  4. tree

    fruit stopping fat loss

    How come no one told me? Here I am, having not eaten fruit for the last ten years or so*, and yet still fat! Apparently my body did not get that memo.

    *I suffer from fructose malabsorption and various individual fruit allergies. This is not my idea of a fun time.

  5. Jo

    Oh the ridiculousness of this all. I would rather be happy and eat what I like (and I know that I eat mainly good foods anyway, because my mum was all carrot-sticks-for-school-lunch!) and have some chips whenever I feel like them and keep eating buckets of vegetables and fruit (oh no how evil!) than stick myself on such a diet and try to force my body into a weight it doesn’t naturally fall into. Screw you, diet books.

  6. YetAnotherMatt

    Yes, but don’t you understand that once you stop doing what you think makes you happy, and start doing what other people tell you will make you happy, then they will have your money you will have achieved success?

  7. Jo

    Oh. It think you have just enlightened me. I shall start starving and shaving my legs then. And better hurry up looking for a husband, I’m already 20 and all the good ones will disappear soon. But then again, I can’t get one looking like this. I’ll just go sign up for some cosmetic surgery too.

  8. lilacsigil

    Oh, it’s all that broccoli that made me fat! Case closed!

  9. Helen

    I have learned some interesting things about fruit juice – it’s really not that good for you if you buy it bottled, and yes, the effect on your teeth and pancreas will be similar to soft drink if you overdo it. Dried fruit can stick in the teeth and cause decay like lollies do (Sob!) (Although increased brushing/flossing could fix that.) Fresh whole fruit, however, is a whole other thing. And green vegetables?! These people might think they’re doing something good for themselves – until they find themselves with colon cancer. I hope the diet includes some kind of fibre.

  10. Jess

    who would have thought that cutting out entire food groups could result in short-term weight loss?

  11. meerkat

    Last I heard, skipping breakfast was a method used by sumo wrestlers who want to bulk up.

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