Sod it, I’m going for a walk

A river view looking towards a park on the far bank

One of the views from the river walk at Tempe

Every year when the shorter days come, I remind myself that I need to get out and about in the sunlight at least every second day to keep the SAD at bay.

Today I’m going to damn well do it. I think I’ll do the river walk rather than the dogpark walk today.

Categories: health


38 replies

  1. 🙂 Onya, tigtog.

  2. Except I haven’t gone yet! I’m leaving in 10 minutes, 15 tops. Really.

  3. So it’s 10.52am now and you’ve gone for a walk, right? We actually had a lovely afternoon in the park on Sunday and went from “Do I have to ride my bike, I’ll never ride without training wheels” to “Can I just do a couple more laps?”. Still using one training wheel, was about to show Mum that he didn’t really need it when a huge stack occured, possible broken thumb (not broken, probably just bruised) and we went home instead. Some courage has returned and we think we might do it again this weekend. Except this time we will dig out the bike helmets for the kids and the hats and sunscreen as well.

  4. I managed sitting on my front deck for a bit yesterday, that was nice. We’re going to Blacktown Medieval festival this weekend, outside for 2 whole days!

  5. (((hugs))) Maybe the dog park tomorrow with a really big dog?

    • Thanks for the hugs, Mindy. For those who haven’t read it elsewhere, an old guy tried to grab me under the guise of a friendly hand-shake while I was out on my walk today.
      I easily broke his hold, keeping my hand towards him palm open in the ready-to-shove position, and he backed off, so I wasn’t harmed. Actually, he was so frail that it didn’t seem all that threatening while I was in the moment. I came across my sister out on her own walk 15 minutes later and didn’t even think to tell her about it. Then when I got home I realised that she should know because she jogs on the same river path regularly, so I called her, and she told me that her houseguest had had almost certainly the same old guy on the same path grab her arm after a handshake and insist on giving her a kiss on the cheek only last week.
      So, sometime this evening I’ll be giving the police a statement. And so will my sister’s houseguest. There were lots of women out exercising alone on that path today, some of them elderly and some of them very young. He may not be so frail that he’s harmless.

  6. This is my first winter in Canberra having come from warmer climates. The cold nights and frosty mornings are becoming bearable, but the inhospitality gets to me. It’s too cold to do anything after 5pm (sez me, at least).
    The dog is getting down to one sunny Saturday morning walk a week, if that.

  7. tigtog, I’m (generally) free Mondays and Tuesdays, if you want to plan the odd Hoyden Hike* for those days let me know. An appointment to see the sun…
    *Where “hike” is chosen for alliteration over descriptiveness, I actually mean an amble.

  8. That’s awful. I’m so sorry, tigtog.

  9. *more hugs* for tigtog
    I need to make a coat for our dog, she gets cold when we’re on our Viking camps – no microfleece though! I’ve got some wool horse blanket material that will do the trick.

  10. tigtog: ew what a creeper. I hope the report allows him to be identified.
    Generally, let me know whenever an ambling impulse comes along…

    • I’m much more creeped out about it now than I was at the time. His technique seems so practisedly sly. I can’t help wondering how often he’s tried this on, and whether he sometimes tries to do much more.

  11. Well that sucks more than a hull breach on the HMS Suckitude orbiting a black hole at a height of sux thousand metres. Hope you’re ok, tigtog, and it doesn’t deter you from living normally.
    Telling the police straight away was definitely the right thing to do. A similar situation happened to me last year, and the confrontations got more assault-y every time until I was forced to go and tell them. It’s one of those borderline things where you can easily convince yourself you’re overreacting.

    • I don’t intend to let it stop me getting my fresh air, but I might think about carrying a golf umbrella with me on the river walk to discourage such contact in future.
      Just gave my statement to the police. They asked me whether I wanted to press charges if they could identify him, and I said not particularly, but that if he were ever charged with something similar or more serious, that I would be very willing to testify in court to establish a pattern of behaviour.

  12. Sorry to hear that, Tigtog. I’m glad you’re OK.

  13. Gah, sorry that your walk was marred like that, tigtog!
    I’ve been trying to walk (almost) every morning. Most of the time I have to get up quite early, in order to get to work on time, but on my non-work days I’m trying to go a bit later, so I can get some of the sunlight that my doctor tells me that I need!

  14. Sorry tigtog. Glad you’re ok.

  15. Well, if you hadn’t been wearing those alluring tracky dacks and polar fleece – you know how men have no control when faced with a woman wearing such things.

  16. Cooks River walking has much to recommend it. NB:


  17. I was advised, when battling SAD, to walk in the late afternoon so that I would be in natural light at sunset. My doctor said it helped the brain process the day/night transition when it was gradual and natural. It helped.

  18. Got a call from the police a couple of hours ago – they’ve arrested a man (who matches the description I gave in my verbal statement of complaint) for accosting a young woman in the same park today. I’ll be making a formal (signed) statement tomorrow.

  19. Hugs.

  20. So somebody else decided to press charges?
    Hope you’re okay doing it, tigtog, and it gives him a wakeup call and/or means he gets the care he needs (NB. My great-grandfather was prone to this sort of behaviour in his last years of life. Alzheimers and that whole patriarchal cultural indoctrination thing)

    • @Aphie, I’m very aware of the possibility of it being a dementia related behaviour, although I’ve worked in geriatric rehab a lot and he did not appear especially confused to me. Still, one can become disinhibited without being otherwise terribly confused, so if that’s what’s going on then the man needs help rather than punishment, definitely.

  21. Oh tigtog! I read this thread while at work the other day and didn’t have time to comment. Then I read the story in the SMH the next day and wondered. 😦
    I remember an old guy demanding I kiss him when I was a teenager, and there are a few older guys in this area who hassle young girls and women to talk to them, fawn over them etc, and one in particular who is quite pervy and it’s frustrating because sometimes you think there might be an issue with their lucidity, but I frequently feel as though they are using their societal position as elderly men (and the fact that you can’t be sure they don’t have dementia) to leverage patience with their inappropriateness, and that they target young women precisely because young women are likely to feel they have to be polite and accommodating of older. Although I think it’s all on the same continuum it’s obviously not the same as what you’re talking about here.

    • There was a story in the SMH?

      it’s frustrating because sometimes you think there might be an issue with their lucidity, but I frequently feel as though they are using their societal position as elderly men (and the fact that you can’t be sure they don’t have dementia) to leverage patience with their inappropriateness, and that they target young women precisely because young women are likely to feel they have to be polite and accommodating of older

      That was definitely my feeling of what was going on, with the “making a move” aspect of going for a handshake and then pulling me in closer for a kiss.
      But you can’t adequately assess/diagnose someone in an encounter that only lasts a few moments, you can only form an impression. A proper assessment/diagnosis is for an experienced geriatric clinician to do.

  22. Yes, there was a small article about the arrest of a 76 year old man (from memory) for the sexual assault of a young woman in a park and gave a geographic description that seemed to match.
    I hear you on the diagnosis front and in the end that’s the problem for me is that my compassion for someone who might be acting inappropriately out of confusion restrains the impulse to say ‘Just LEAVE these women (or me) ALONE’. It can be tricky to extricate yourself ‘politely’ from a situation in which you feel uncomfortable and imposed upon and I find I can get stuck in pasting a polite face on while I’m thinking ‘Get the fuck away from me’. Again the situation you’re talking about is different to this since once you’re grabbed any ‘politeness’ requirements go out the window.

    • Ah, the age detail meant that I found it online. It matches with a couple of things the police told me.
      What I found surprising and reassuring for my own confidence was that without thinking about it I did a very quick judo hand move that broke his hold on me, which ended naturally in holding my hand up in a warding position which, combined with moving into a classic defensive stance, showed him that I wouldn’t let him get close again.
      It’s 30 years since I did any judo, and 20 years since I’ve done any self defence stuff at all. Glad to know some of it still sticks.

  23. Yes, that must be really reassuring tigtog! I’ve not really been caught in that kind of situation and I wonder how I would handle it…
    A friend of my mother woke up one night to find a man leaning over her bed. Without batting an eyelid she drew her knees up to her chest and kicked him hard with both feet right in the chest. He took off like a gunshot. I’m always afraid I’d freeze. Maybe it’s time to do another self defence class? I’m trying to persuade miniFP to get into some kind of martial art, perhaps we could enrol at the same school?

    • I believe quite a few martial arts schools like it when parents sign up along with their kids, so it’s very much worth a try. It’s good to know the basics of how to break a hold and get off a good kick if needed so that you can run away.
      I’m just thinking while discussing this though how lucky I am to have that level of physical capability at all. No wonder PWDs are so often targeted by predatory perves – self defence is so much harder.

      • I went and gave my formal signed statement this afternoon. Why are detectives so young?
        I so wanted a red pencil and access to the keyboard to type it up. The statement ended up being accurate as to the facts of the incident, but it was so much not the way I would have written it up myself. Very odd – I wonder if all writers feel like that when having to deal with giving a witness statement?
        P.S. Try not to be my age and have to give a witness statement about something that happened near a shrubbery. Nervous giggles and an ejaculation of “Ni!” were met with the blankly polite stare of someone too young to have seen Python on free to air. (Confirmed by asking him whether he knew his Monty Python. Response: negative.) I left him a note with the search terms to put into YouTube so that he knows why I was doing that.

  24. I desperately wanted to edit the statement I gave after being held up at knife point when I worked at a pawnbrokers.
    My children are well-versed in Monty Python and would have responded to your “Ni!” with instructions to cut down the largest tree in the forest with a herring.

  25. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to remember – a very similar thing happened to me about 6 months ago. A guy put out his hand to shake and then grabbed my arm to pull me forward to try to kiss me.
    At the time I didn’t really think much of it, just dismissed it as one of those things. But thinking back on it, that’s really creepy and horrible.
    Anyway Tigtog, I’m glad the police are taking it seriously.

  26. Kirstente,
    I’m glad you were OK. And yes, it is creepy and horrible.
    I was pleasantly surprised that the police did take it so seriously. It probably helped that I stated my concerns assertively (but not in an “upset” way) that his behaviour presented a risk to the many more vulnerable women using that path, especially elderly women who might fall and break a hip if accosted, and that whether it was confusion or premeditation, he needed to be stopped.
    This is something that the current rules on sexual harassment at work might eradicate for future generations – men won’t be able to fall back cognitively to a time in their lives when it was OK for them to grab the women in the office and give them a “friendly” kiss just as part of the masculine display, because it just is no longer OK.

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