Hot on the heels of my last spray about fat comes 12 surprising ways your house is making you fat! I kid you not. Since I’m a sucker for seeing what made my workmate laugh so hard I read through this, and now I will share it with you.
1. Your dining room and kitchen are painted red (see full article for explanation of why this makes you fat). But mine aren’t. The cupboards are a sage green colour, the floor tiles are cream and the walls are a beigey cream colour. In fact by that description you are more likely to be bored to death in my kitchen than hungry.
2. You don’t have a pantry. Yes, I do. I am still fat.
3. Your kitchen is the hub of the home. Wrong again.
4. Too much furniture to sit on. OMG my lounge is making me fat?! Shouldn’t the exercise bike in the loungeroom be overcoming that though? This didn’t work either when it was a treadmill instead of an exercise bike. You would think I would have learnt by now that the mere presence of exercise equipment in my loungeroom doesn’t inspire me to use it. Although it is rather handy having it just near the ironing board for extra hanging space on the handle bars.
5. Create your own veggie patch. You are more likely to want to eat the veggies you grow yourself because you have worked hard to cultivate them. I am living proof that this is not necessarily so. Although the feeling of smug when I do use one of the onions that multiplied freely for three years before I finally pulled them out is tremendous and the people who fed the cats and chooks when we were on holidays said that the spinach we grew was great in a Lamb Saag. The spinach is still growing and we haven’t tried their lamb saag recipe yet.
6. Your plates and dishes are oversized. Yep because a smaller plate magically stops me going back for seconds, or from getting another plate out of the cupboard to put my dessert in or sneaking a handful of chocolate without using a plate at all! Or any of the other varied reasons why I might be fat and plate size completely irrelevant.
For some reason 1/2 way through I get tips on cleaning pots. Not sure why, but if it helps you then good.
7. Your bedroom is not relaxing. Since someone told me, when we were trying to get pregnant, to keep the bedroom for sleeping and sex we haven’t had a TV in there and that was 10 years ago. Occassionally I cheat and sneak in to read in bed, and when I’m sick or just sick of the kids I might go in there and watch DVDs on the laptop. But that is reasonably rare and doesn’t affect my sleep. Lack of sleep is not making me fat (or allowing me to continue being fat).
8. Too much light or not enough. Surprisingly I like to see what I am eating so the lights are at fairly normal light levels in my house. I don’t have brightly lit spaces because they use too much electricity and after a while the glare hurts my eyes.
9. Machines are taking over. Ah ha it is all the dishwasher’s fault! But I do still stand at the sink to wash up the overflow or the stuff that can’t go in the dishwasher. Damn thought I was onto a winner there.
10. Awesome entertainment system. I would like to have an awesome entertainment system, but I do not. We tend to watch the news at dinner time, but I have to say that between the ABC’s efforts on political reporting and the kids’ whinging about changing the channel it is more offputting than appetite raising.
11. Bathrooms on multiple floors. My house doesn’t have multiple floors and the ensuite, which I use most frequently, is at the other end of the house. So lack of exercise walking to the toilet is not making me fat.
12. Your coffee table is covered in food porn. My coffee table is covered in bits of food because my children are messy eaters and I don’t buy many magazines. You join the dots.
So no joy for me there. However, while looking for a good featured image I found this lovely blog post. I hope you enjoy it too.