This is a montage of images from hyperventilating stories about Salma Hayek “Still”! Breastfeeding! At! 13! Months!
The world has burst into a babblefest of gossip about how bizarre this is. There has been an outpouring of shock and disdain, complete with accusations of perversity and child sexual abuse. Here’s a sampling of the buzz.
GossipBabe.com reports:
Salma Hayek is still breastfeeding her 13 month old daughter Valentina-Paloma, for three reasons:
first because it’s good for her baby’s health, second because she feels she shares a special bond with her daughter, and third because she loves how big her milkers got, trying to pass it off as being addicted to breastfeeding:
“I’m like an alcoholic. It is like, I don’t care if I cry, I don’t care if I am fat, I am just going to do it for one more week, one more month, and then when I see how much good it is doing her and I can’t stop.”
Where does it say there that she feeds for the breast enlargement? She enjoys breastfeeding, and she believes it is good for her daughter. OMG! A woman is happily mothering! Stop the presses!
…Why are the presses stopped? Because Salma Hayek’s breasts are public property, that’s why.
Salma Hayek is still breast-feeding her daughter, Valentina, whom she had with French businessman François-Henri Pinault in September 2007. Breast-feeding for an entire year. I have to wonder if that’s not one of the reasons the wedding was called off? Maybe ex-squeeze wanted a little more action than what the kiddo was getting.
SALMA HAYEK is addicted to BREASTFEEDING. THAT SUCKS..
From the comments:
As A Licensed Psychiatrist I agree that children should be weaned at about a year old. Beyond that breastfeeding is not necessary and is likely to be some form of child sexual abuse. Clearly once a child is able to eat solids and drink from a cup breastfeeding is not needed. I think some women use it as an excuse in order to fullfill some emotional void in their life or sexual void. Its a lack of maturity on the womans part. It tends to create emotionally damaged children. This children are clearly overly dependent on their mother. They have a lot of issues throughout their lives and require counseling and other things to try to get some normalacy back.
In Other Words–That is Just Plain Fucked UP!!!
[...]
What Thom said…after a year, she is definitely doing her daughter a disservice unnecessarily creating potential serious dependency and abandonment issues that could last a lifetime…also I detect a certain sexual, exhibitionist element accompanying the statement that she’s “addicted” to having a 1 year old person suck on her breasts…it’s not like the kid is going to starve without it…Wow Selma, I didn’t realize it was all about YOU and not the kid, ya annoying, attention mongering, self serving bitch…the woman has “issues” and needs to have her head examined.
The Huffington Post comments are a mix of breastfeeding support, colossal ignorance, leering over Hayek’s breasts, and accusations of creepiness and obscenity. A sampling of the negative comments:
If this keeps up, that kid will have to go to a college within 5 miles of home.
Honestly…What kid could give those up?
sooo hot
and people fight to ban breastfeeding in public…
Suddenly , I’m in the mood for chocolate-chip cookies…
It’s obscene! once a kid has TEETH, the breastfeeding can stop! THey can eat mushy food now!
ew. I know new moms who think breastfeeding after 6 months is indecent.
OK guys. Line forms behind me!
I am soooo jealous of that baby!
When a kid can walk over, lift up the mom’s shirt on his own, and say that he wants some…. well that is just plain CREEPY. Breastfeeding should stop at around a year old.
Yeah, TMI but more power to her. I breastfed my oldest son for 15 months. But when they start asking for it, it’s time to stop!
I love you, Salma, but TMI, girl, TMI
When they are old enough to ask, maybe it’s time to wean. That being said, Selma looks wonderful, and I think it is fine that she is breast feeding her 14-month-old.
for the first time in my adult male life I suddenly wish to be a little mexican girl… ; )
I wanna be adopted by her.
Breast Milk is nasty.
TEE HEE…NICE TATA’S!!!
Salma, please breastfeed me…
That photo has my mouth watering, and I’m in my thirties.
Here, here… Let’s belly up to the breast, er, bar boys!
She’s is an excellent actress in my opinion, but the boob show is bad. She has milk-swollen breasts being pushed up and really, it’s gross. What is this obsession with women, particularly actresses, having their boobs bulging out like cows?
Man, what can I say? Can I have a snack?
Celebrity Baby Blog to the rescue! Leaving out the weight-loss talk:
Good for her.
It’s wonderful to hear a celeb talking about extended nursing. My son is 16 months and we’re still nursing.
yea for salma! i found that breastfeeding was very hard at first, but i kept at it and am so glad i did. it was effortless after awhile.
I thrill to hear celebrity mothers speak out about extended nursing – it warms my heart.
I think it’s fantastic that she said she would continue nursing no matter what, even if she was fat. That’s HUGE in Hollywood! Kudos to Salma!
I think it is great that Salma is doing what is best for her and her baby. She looks fabulous and her baby is one lucky baby!
So what’s going on here?
It’s not as simple as “The Patriarchy wants women to not breastfeed” or “The Patriarchy wants women to breastfeed”. What The Patriarchy “wants” (if you’ll bear with me on this somewhat teleological train of thought) is to have control over breastfeeding. Sometimes that might involve coercion to breastfeed (while withholding full support), sometimes coercion to not breastfeed, sometimes breastfeeding is a tool to confine women to the domestic environment, sometimes guilt over not breastfeeding is cultivated to sell women more products. Above all, breastfeeding women are reminded day after day after day that their bodies are public property, that breastfeeding isn’t a free pass out of the sex class, and that whatever they do, there will be no shortage of people telling them that they’re doing it wrong.
Australian and USAn societies are down there with the lowest breastfeeding rates in the world. We have developed a peculiarly pernicious mix of:
* half-secularised Puritanism;
* half-baked woman-hating Freudianism;
* toxic capitalism;
* mother-hostile workplace practices;
* social isolation of new mothers;
* a deep-seated fear and suspicion of any bodily intimacy that isn’t sexual;
* and an overwhelming sense of proprietorship of breasts by heterosexual men.
The jealousy thread is the one that’s standing out to me today. (Other days, it’s other things.) CelebAmour brought this home when they blamed Hayek’s relationship breakup on breastfeeding – a common allegation levelled at new mothers. When women use their breasts in ways that don’t centre around men’s desires, women are demonised. And what better way to demonise people than to denounce them for our most despised crime, child sexual abuse?
Physical closeness with a baby can be pleasurable, sensual; and our society is flummoxed by that. We confuse all sensuality and physical pleasure with sexuality. Breasts are seen as a symbol of women’s sexual availability, from Page Three Girls to pornstars to politicians’ cleavage. Combine physical intimacy with the fact that breasts are involved and men are being ignored, and misogynists come out of the woodwork, finger-pointing and gibbering.
Then there’s the biological ignorance. The arguments about teeth, based in biological and evolutionary nonsense, fall at the slightest examination. “Teeth are for food!”, people argue, claiming that once babies grow their first incisors, they are obviously biologically ready for weaning. In fact, we are the only primate to wean that early - others wean around the time that the first permanent molars appear.
Arguments based in linguistic development make even less sense, if that’s possible. “If a baby can ask for it, it’s time to stop!” ignores that fact that babies ask to be fed from birth – many can even latch themselves on with no assistance. Linguistic development varies dramatically between babies, with some developing words as early as six months, and some as late as two years or beyond (or never, of course, for some). Why the timing of the first word should coincide with forced weaning is beyond me.
People parrot stuff from the world around them. My generation is repeating received wisdom from the doctors of our mothers and aunts, at a time when breastfeeding was at its lowest ebb. NASA was putting men on the moon, science was king, and women were told that super-technological “clean”, “healthy”, “modern” formula was the best possible thing for their babies and for them. They were told that if their newborn wanted to feed more than once every three hours, their milk “wasn’t rich enough”. They were told that babies should sleep through the night. They were told that holding babies spoiled them. They were told, with wrinkled nose, that breastfeeding was just for “primitive” people.
There’s a huge privilege issue in here as well. The only reason some industrialised societies have had the opportunity to develop this overweening “breasts are just for sex!” attitude is because we have the privilege to feed babies modified cows’ milk from a bottle without a huge proportion of them dying. While artificial feeding does carry significant risks even in the best circumstances, artificial feeding causes one and a half million deaths worldwide every year. However, the World Health Organisation’s recommendation that breastfeeding continue to two years and beyond is not limited to countries with unsafe water supplies; it applies wordwide. (More at the ABA and kellymom.)
And, because any post in support of breastfeeding is bound to bring the “You’re just being a big ol’ meanyhead to formula-feeding mums!” comments out, here’s my general approach, as outlined here before:
* Can’t breastfeed? My sympathy if you’re grieving, and the best support, assistance, substitutes (ideally donor human milk) and assistive devices should be available.
* Won’t breastfeed? This is none of my business, on an individual level. It’s your body. My only interest is on a collective level, insofar as patriarchal society is coercing women’s choices, via socialisation, marketing, abuse, social isolation, religious oppression, medical misinformation, workplace practices, and so on.
* When people start leering, demonising, accusing, and excluding women for mothering? I. see. red.
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- The intense hatred of nurturing female bodies: Kelly Rutherford “still breastfeeding” by Lauredhel
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- Gone too far? by Lauredhel
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I can not believe how ignorant people are. There are so many benefits for baby breastfeeding past the first year as there are when they are newborns. BREAST MILK is WHOLE MILK, not to mention is also as ORGANIC as it can get, and to think people throw away money thinking they are getting the best for their babies by buying them a POWDER REPLICA OF THE REAL THING (formula). It really saddens me how us women are manipulated and looked as sexual objects in this society. To all of those ignorants out there please educate your selves before you post a comment . Salma is very rich woman that could get breast implants if she wanted them bigger. Her reasons for breastfeeding, I’m sure, go far beyond how her looks.
PS. I’m not trying to make any mother feel bad or guilty about not being able to breastfeed, instead, I am encouraging all those mommys out there to do whats best for their babies. WAY TO SALMA!!!!
“Grandma”, that was a great comment, thank you.
As a feminist, you would think that I would think about breastfeeding as empowerment for women. However, as women, specifically mothers, we need to think about it another way. Why is American media pushing breastfeeding on us so heavily for the last few years? Suddenly, if a woman chooses not to breastfeed, she is told that she is not a good mother. Where is choice? Women have been struggling for equal rights for many years, and you know what, we are still not equal. Sexism still exists significantly. I believe that American society believes that women have forgotten about their fight for equality and by pushing breastfeeding on women, they are just enforcing the notion of women as nothing but children and milk-producing animals, like cows. Until women have rejected popular notions of society and broken out of their “normal” duties such as breastfeeding, will we ever be taken seriously, as intelligent individuals. Do not listen to everything society tells you to do. Be revolutionary and see that breast is not always best.
Rhonda, have you read anything I’ve written on breastfeeding? On feminism? Try the “Related Posts”, for a start, and then perhaps the front page and down from there.
Where are you from? Do you realise that we’re not in America? Are you a mother? What kind of industry do you work in? Does it bother you that you sound exactly like the formula company “social media” PR people sent out to promote their expensive mass-produced product as “empowerment”?
“Sexism still exists significantly.” Head. Desk.
Rhonda, you might want to look up the definition of “mammal”. Because we are actually “milk-producing animals, like cows”.
I actually found breastfeeding very empowering. “Yes, I am pulling out my breast in public and putting it in this baby’s mouth, because that’s what it’s for not just a lump of flesh for someone to look at and comment upon.
Lauredhel @ 97, oh SNAP. Man, Court, doesn’t it SUCK when you’re trying to be haughty and condescending and it backfires cos it turns out you’re a fool who didn’t read it properly in the first place?
fuckpoliteness’s last blog post..No, I don’t think I *will* cheer on the ‘big boys’ thanks
I’m sorry for talking about America, but I do not think it is funny to make sexism seem as if it is insignificant, LauredHel. Take your head off your desk and wake up. Look around you. See how women face so many challenges everyday. Read about postcolonial feminism if it can help you get in touch with the pain that so many women feel today. Yes, women produce milk for their infants, but personally, I do not believe women are actually cows. Women are intelligent beings, and I believe that each one of us should see each other for the goddesses that we are. Mindy, I am very happy you find it empowering. My message to all is simply to think about things differently. Not everything is what it seems. Society has been creating ideas and rules for centuries. We have to think outside of the box. We have to ask ourselves if we are really doing the things that we want to do or if we are doing the things people tell us to.
Well that’s told me. We’re sticking to the three comment rule, right?
Rhonda, I really suggest you stop and read the rest of the blog before going any further. And read this actual post again, to see if you can figure out what it’s actually about.
I’d also like an answer to this, please, before you say anything more here: “What kind of industry do you work in? “
Hi Rhonda…
I guess I hear you – I’m just a bit puzzled. If you read the other posts on this (obviously this is one where you have a disagreement) I think you’ll find that this blog thinks differently, questions rules, thinks outside the box etc. Whatever else you might think of it, this is *not* a place where women’s pain at oppression is mocked.
I believe the *headdesk* was over the fact that this blog is all about sexism existing significantly, so more over you pointing out the premise of the entire blog to its moderators who have spent so much time and energy discussing exactly that.
@Rhonda: we’re swimming in irony. A concern troll comes onto a thread for a blog post all about how women are treated unfairly when it comes to breast feeding, and accuses the author of ignoring how women are treated unfairly when it comes to breast feeding. That’s why we’re doing headdesks. You’re not paying attention.
Aerik’s last blog post..Failings and Flailing of feminist Allies
personally, I do not believe women are actually cows
I disagree! We are all clearly great big cows. And it behooves me to say that I am udderly opposed to so-called feminists milking this issue, just because they have a beef with animal comparisons. It’s time that this argument should be put out to pasture, and we mooved on. I’ll defend my bovine rights until I come home.
Just beautiful AK. I found that really mooving.
What can I say; I’m out-standing in my field.
Maybe if we all pull together, we can teatch Rhonda a thing or two.
…sorry.
Don’t be sorry, we should milk this for all it’s worth.
I think you need to beef up the comments policy.
Rebekka’s last blog post..Where’s Jules?
There’s already a comprehensive cattlelogue of moos and don’ts, and Rhonda’s made mince-meat of them so far. But vea’l play with her a bit longer, no matter how cheesy it might get.
I think we are all abreast of the situation now. I’m finding this udderly amusing.
We’re milking it for all it’s worth…
Although I fear Rhonda’s opinions may turn out to be immoovable, despite our high-steaks humour.
She’s probably feeling a little bailed-up right now. Maybe she is ruminating.
Ewes are incowrrigible.
Penni’s last blog post..First Day
Oh no, we’re not incowrigible, we’re coming up with very mooving arguments.
Rebekka’s last blog post..Where’s Jules?
*groans*
… oh, sorry, i meant *moos*
It behooves me to keep this thread going. (I’ve been saving that one since last night).
We could keep this up til the cows come home.
Rebekka’s last blog post..Where’s Jules?
I’m glad this thread has got life in it still. It’s getting be quite a meaty topic now.
Your jokes are so funny I camembert it.
Chally’s last blog post..Fancy that, did you know, FYI
This moohaha is most amoosing, but seriously, there’s a lot at steak here. Think of the calves, won’t somebody think of the calves?
Just an udder day with the Hoydens.
Rebekka’s last blog post..Let me eat cake
I love that people suggest that breast feeding should stop at “around” a year old. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t a year and one month “around” a year?
Eli: yes, a year and a month is “around” a year, yes. But the larger point is that there is absolutely no reason breastfeeding should stop there, it should be none of anyone else’s business when it doesn’t, there are physiological reasons why breastfeeding for much longer is appropriate, and this particular issue shouldn’t serve as a touchstone for every misogynist piece of shit out there to put their two cents in.
Of course the guideline isn’t that it should stop at around a year. It’s that it should continue for *at least* a year!
8-)
P.S. Best blog post title ever.
Liz: The World Health Organisation recommendations are that it should continue to two years and beyond, as I say in the post. There’s no reason the AAP guidelines – an organisation sponsored by a number of infant formula companies – should take precedence over that.
Thanks for this blog. It’s wonderful and it’s exactly how I feel about the whole issue. I need to introduce my husband to it because I know he’s going to be difficult about breastfeeding past a year when we have children and you are so much more eloquent than I. Thanks again. Love the comments too.
can i just say w/o causing controversy that if i had Salma’s glorious glands i too would breastfeed for as long as possible?!!! As it is, me and my 2 1/2 yo will plod along “making do” with my mom-of-three-breastfed-babies-boobies and enjoy every minute of it although apparently i will need to start saving now for some serious therapy later in life….sigh…
i must live in such a bubble that i didn’t realize that the reports about SH breastfeeding were negative and derogatory until i read this post and i was so sad because i just thought it was the most beautiful thing that she was able to nurture that precious little guy as well as her own baby. And the real problem seems to be that her baby is 13!Months!Old!
How ridiculous…i mean really – aren’t there real issues in the world (like the baby she was feeding, his mother was too ill to make milk for him most likely because of a contaminated water supply) that could be debated… what a place.
I think it’s sickening that someone would suggest that anyone who breastfeeds after a year, is bein sexually abusive to the baby. What would those people have to say to wet nurses? Lactating women who donate thier milk and even sometimes thier breast to a child who’s mother is unable to breastfeed. I guess those people are sick and demented too. I am a mother of two and i’m a statistic, a mother who simply didn’t produce anywhere near enough milk to feed wither of my kids…If i had the chance to breastfeed i would have done it for at the very least a year for many reasons, there are so many possitives as far as health for mother and child including lowers the chance of breast cancer for both, and thats only one health reason. There also convenience, not having to run around trying to warm a bottle in public, not having to mix formula, not having to try to find which formula works best for ur baby, the cost of formula. I look at how much i spend each month on formula for my son and i am shocked. I think every woman has the right to do what selma is doing and shouldn’t be critisized for it, in other countries it’s just normal for babies to nurse beyond a year. There is of course a line where realisticly a baby should not be nursing but 13 months is definately not it…The only demented people i’ve read on here so far are the ones critisizing and calling her sick for doing so
The WHO recommends two years. They’re not just pulling numbers out of thin air. It’s frustrating to see people react against breast-feeding past a year (the CDC recommendation) without bothering to find out facts.
And for the crowd who think that if the baby no longer depends on his/her mother’s milk for survival, they should be cut off? One of the women in my church continued breast-feeding on demand. Her two year old could climb up in her lap and ask for the breast. Do you know what that little one learned? He learned that if he needed comfort, he could ask and he would be comforted. I think that’s a better lesson than learning that asking means you get cut off.
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