If a dad freaks out after his six-year-old innocently says the word ‘pen*s’ when reading a sign some teenagers have pranked, experience tells me that said six-year-old might just think it was enormous fun to say that word over and over and over again just to make daddy’s eyes bug out. Working out whether when his face changes colour like that it matches the crimson or the magenta crayon more exactly might be considered enormous fun as well.
But apparently, Bryan Flynn thinks such a reaction from his six-year-old indicates a “traumatized” child, and requires channelling Ned Flanders:
This has shaken the bedrock of our family. I made an emergency call to our church’s pastor about this bombshell in my daughter’s life and he is unsure how it will affect her future.
The only evidence Bryan has for any claimed “traumatizing” is that his daughter won’t stop saying the word penis. I really hope that pastor rolled his eyes at that call as much as I would, and that the response Bryan quotes was an attempt to calm Bryan down, which of course Bryan has taken as yet another sign that the sky is falling: even my pastor doesn’t know just how bad this is for her!
As for the daughter, she sounds like a hoyden after my own heart. Let’s hope she gets away from batty Brian without too much real trauma once she’s grown.
(hat-tip Terry C, who keeps finding these gems)
UPDATE: this story so fascinated me I did some related google-noodling. The Fallbrook-Bonsall area has a population of approx 35,000 served by 44 churches, all Protestant except for the single Catholic and lone Bah’ai churches. The community website emphasises the dominance of Christian religiosity in the life of the town.
The Fallbrook Story
The Greater Fallbrook and Bonsall areas have come to be viewed as model communities in endeavors such as art, land conservation, health care, business enhancement, Christian unity, and much more.
I was genuinely shocked to discover that some of my favourite Ned Flanders moments from The Simpsons were cut from the syndicated episodes shown in the USA, in order not to offend the religious. They’re some of the best bits!