Party-thrower and all-round knob Corey Delaney speaks out on Current Affair. The full ACA report is available here, but here’s the key interview with Corey himself. Before watching, read “But it’s OK – they’re white!” at Road to Surfdom.
Transcript of interview (any mistakes are mine) follows. Corey wears a multicoloured cap, straw-bleached hair, a fur-lined jacket open displayed his pierced nipple, and comically large sunglasses.
Interviewer: Corey, thanks for joining us. The only question I can think to ask is – What were you thinking?
Corey: Uuuum – I wasn’t, really.
I: Did your parents say you could have a party?
C: Arrm – No.
I: So – why did you?
C: Uuuum – I dunno. It was just a get-together with a coupla mates at first, and then we thought, we might as well just have a bit of a party, and then it sorta just got outta hand, and – yeah.
I: Well, 500 people turned up, the air wing of the police force, the dog squad, your neighbour’s cars were being destroyed. What have your parents had to say, Corey?
C: Um, I haven’t really talked to them, because every time they’ve called, I don’t answer. Cos, yeah. They’ll probably try to kill me.
I: So – that’s a short term strategy. You’re going to have to talk to them eventually. What are you going to say?
C: Uuuum. Sorry?
I: Are you sorry?
C: Aaaah – Yeah? Yeah, I am.
I: You don’t sound very sorry.
C: I can’t be exactly blamed for everything that happened, because it wasn’t in the house, it was out in the street, and I didn’t do it – like – the police said “You stay inside, so you don’t get in trouble”, so I did do what he said. So.
I: Why don’t you take this opportunity now to apologise, to your parent, and to your neighbours, who have said today that they were frightened.
C: Well, I’ve already offered – I’ve already offered like to say sorry to them and stuff when I see them, so – I will say sorry now for everything that happened, and –
I: Why don’t you take your glasses off so we can see you? And then apologise to your neighbours for frightening them?
C: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Naaaah. I’ll leave these on. Nah, I like ’em.
I: They might be fined twenty thousand dollars. Are you going to try and pay that for them?
C: Yeah, but I don’t think it’s fair they’ll be fined it, cos what happened – it was my party, but it could of just been any random person in the street doing it. It happens all the time.
I: Your parents were out of town, you put out the invitation, you started it. Why don’t you make a grown-up decision now and accept responsibility? Take off those glasses, and apologise to everybody that you frightened, to the police who were forced to retreat and whose cars have been damaged, and to the community who have to pay for this? Take your – take off your glasses and apologise to us.
C: [sulkily] I’ll say sorry, but I’m not gonna take off my glasses.
I: Why not?
C: Cuz. They’re famous.
I: Because your glasses are famous?
I: Why are your glasses famous?
C: I dunno – everyone lllikes them. So I dunno. I’m not takin’ ’em off.
I: You’re pretty happy with the way you look, and the attitude you’ve got, are you?
C: Yeah! My parents aren’t, but I am.
I: OK Corey, we’ve gotta wrap this up. But what would you say to other kids who were thinking of partying when their parents are out of town?
C: Get me to do it for you.
I: Get you to do it for you. Not, “Don’t do it.”
C: Yeah! Nah! Get me to do it for you. “Best party ever so far”, that’s what everybody’s been saying, so.
I: Well, we’ve got to go. But I suggest you go away and take a long hard look at yourself.
C: I have. Everyone has. They love it.