OK, Pavlov’s Cat infected Ampersand Duck, and it’s contagious.
Everyone remembers the old porn name game, right?
YOUR PORN NAME
(First Pet’s Name + Name of Street First Lived On)
Here are the rest:
YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME
(grandfather/grandmother on your father’s side, your favorite sweet/lolly):
YOUR FLY GIRL/GUY NAME
(first initial of first name followed by “izzle”, first two or three letters of your last name followed by “dizzle”):
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME
(favorite color, favorite animal):
YOUR STAR WARS NAME
(first 3 letters of your name- last 3 letters of mother’s maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet’s name repeated twice):
SUPERHERO NAME
(“The”, your favorite color, the automobile you drive):
Superhero weapon of choice?
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Porn: Fluffy Vistamont. If your porn name is alarmingly butch, mine is alarmingly femme. Movie star: Henry Cheesecake. I don’t like where this is going.Fly: Aizzle Waldizzle. Don’t like it. I decided long ago that I’d go the Jennifer Lopez route and adapt A.Wal as my hip-hop handle, even though it sounds like I’m absent without leave.Detective: Navy Panda. I clearly suck at this. Raymond Chandler would have thrown my own drink in my face at this point, because I’m not worth wasting his. Star Wars: Andhol Magmag. Superhero: The Navy Sebring. I’m pretty sure that was a ship of the line in about the Napoleonic era. With a name like that, I wouldn’t make the cut for the Mystery Men, forget the Justice League. I mean, it takes some doing to be lamer than Aquaman, but I think I’ve got it wrapped up.Superhero weapon of choice: Just my wits, guile, and cunning. And a big fucking gun. Why take chances?
Fluffy Cheesecake Panda boy, nevermind. We love you anyway.
We’ve never had pets, which makes me a one name wonderporn star Dover at your service.Joan Chocolate, starring soon at a cinema near you.Red Platypus, unlikely to catch any crims with a stupid name like that.Katlly, a very little-known character in the original Star Wars.The Red Cressida, who can replace a dodgy catalytic converter in a single bound (sadly and expensively this is not really a superpower I possess).