You always hurt the one you love…

Sunday’s Big Brother UK brought with it an elegant vectoring of a classic gross-out urban legend, so I thought I’d share.


Mikey, to Nicole: “Do you know that if you have sex with a dead person you can get this dodgy disease?”

Nicole [interrupts] “Why would you ever think of that?”

Mikey: “Well, wait till you hear this! Wait till you hear this. There was this guy who worked in a morgue, he got a weird infection. His wife got it, I think.”

Nicole: [open mouthed horror]

Mikey: “She went to the doctor, and the doctor said, ‘How did you get this infection?’ ‘I don’t know.’ And the doctor said that apparently there’s only one type or way you get get this: that’s with sex with a dead person.”

Nicole: “Ohhhhhhhh my god!” [looks grossed out]

Mikey: “And that’s why they found out this guy who worked in a morgue had sex with dead people.”

Darnell: “And I told you guys about the kids in Wisconsin that dug up the dead body and tried to have sex with it.”

Stu: [murmurs] “Yeah”

Nicole: “Wha?”

Darnell: “These kids in Wisconsin – there was like a prom queen or cheerleader girl they liked – she died – then they went and dug her up and tried to have sex with her. But they went to the shop and bought condoms first. So.”


[ensuing conversation about appropriate punishment for necrophiliac acts]

Categories: Miscellaneous

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6 replies

  1. Oh, her wide-eyed horror is a classic. You just know that she’d go and check if you told her that “gullible” isn’t in the dictionary.

  2. “I bonk dead people…
    …They don’t know they’re dead…”
    Sorry (scuttles away)

  3. Subtitles! I need subtitles!

    They seem nicer than the Australian housemates, but that could be because I can only understand one word in three.

  4. I transcribed most of it!
    They are much nicer, or at least their dysfunctions are more interesting. The UK BB is much better in both housemate selection and in format than the Australian variety, and the daily shows are infinitely better-edited and more engaging.
    Don’t get me started on Rex and Nicole’s relationship, though. That’s one fucked-up dynamic.

  5. So glad I quit watching this show.
    Nellas last blog post..One little triumph…

  6. Nella: you can probably get your feed reader to filter the TV/Big Brother posts out altogether, so you won’t be subjected to them.

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