Glaucoma drug Lumigan (bimatoprost) has been rebadged as Latisse. I’ve talked about the development of bimatoprost into a cosmetic product here in the past.
Latisse joins Botox, Lap-Band, Natrelle breast implants, and collagen injections and implants, in Allergan’s fleecing-women stable of products. No matter what part of your body the Patriarchy has made you feel insecure about, if you have heaps of time, pots of cash, and a devil-may-care attitude to the potential for adverse effects, Allergan has something you can brush on, inject, or implant in the hope that bodily adjustments will buy you happiness. Advertised results not typical. Standard disclaimers apply.
I set out to write a long post, but ended up throwing up my hands wondering what the fucking point is. If you think you have a disease called “breast ptosis“, you probably also think you have a disease called “hypotrichosis of the eyelashes“, to the dreadful degree that this poor unfortunate soul has it. And don’t ask me how her eyebrow changed colour too. It’s the same woman, they swear. No Photoshop, either. I do feel sorry for that inflamed-looking eyelid margin, though.
So go crazy. It’s only $120 a month, around four times the cost of the glaucoma treatment of the same drug in the same concentration, but you get dinky little eyelash brushes with it. Side effects include itching, reddening of the eyes, growth of hair in other places the brush has touched, skin darkening, irreversible brown pigmentation of the irises, oedema of the macula (central part of the retina), cataracts, armpit homunculus, autonomous nipple, and involuntary Narnia adventures. With apologies to Stephen Colbert.
[Note: this may be of use for those with alopecia totalis/cicatricial alopecia. This is not, however, how it’s being marketed. And I see no reason why those people should pay the 300% cosmetic markup.]
Categories: gender & feminism, health, medicine
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Or by the look of it you could just wear mascara. What exactly is is meant to do?
$120???? Wow. Someone’s got a nice little mark-up on that! That’s nearly 6 times the *wholesale* cost of the Lumigan. At least it’s not TGA approved. Yet.
Is there a place around here I can vomit?
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autonomous nipple
I think I have that. The little collar and lead seems to be working well, though.
Is this Magic Serum that makes hair grow in places? Does this mean my cherished dream of a huge Dali moustache can now be attained?!
I’d be quite happy to pay $120 for involuntary Narnia adventures. Sign me up! Without optional allegory.
Breast ptosis? If you used the Latisse and the little brush on your bosoms and on your chin you could grow extra-long hairs on your nipples and suspend your saggy breast from your face. Great solution!
I’m ashamed of myself, but I am probably going to buy this and have in fact been following it for about a year now. 😦
Amazing Kim: I love that little collar and leash image.
In othr news, Twisty writes about a doctor who cures vaginisimus by “botox injected directly into the old vadge.” Which also, I beleive, would involve the pelvic floor muscles, since they do contract. So, probably urinary incontinence for the rest of your life – sexxay!
I’m going to have to defend Botox here.
I hate the thought that (generally lovely and awesome) women somehow need to stick needles in their face to keep themselves feeling beautiful. We all know that’s pretty much bullshit and hurtful, destructive, undermining bullshit at that.
Nevertheless, the fact that Allergan produces a product to feed that demand has a few good points – they also fund and provide the materials for research into using Botox to reduce spasticity. That’s why the whole injecting procedure was developed in the first place, and it remains a valid non-surgical treatment to help with certain disabilities.
I was one of the first kids they tested that theory on.
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Fizz: it’s cool, we get it, as (I hope) you can see from the footnote to this post. I also have no problem with Lumigan being developed as a glaucoma medication.
If Allergan had limited the marketing of their products to actual medical need, I wouldn’t be writing about them.
LADIES… I would take caution before using this product. in my opinion, the pros out weigh the cons. Side effects are dark circles, change in the color of your iris, red/itchy eyes… hmm, I would think that out weighs having more eyelashes. Not to mention, why go through the hassle of a prescription DRUG when I can purchase a safe product like [advertising deleted ~L]