Kyle Payne, fauxminist, predator, and sexual assaulter, is up for open sentencing on August 11, though he is asking for it to be postponed so that he can continue his “counselling” and solicitation of “letters of support”.
Kyle Payne was a rape crisis advocate, women’s studies student, and resident advisor at his university. While “looking after” an unconscious drunk student in his care, he undid her shirt and took a photograph and video of her breast.
He has now published a statement on his blog, closed comments on it, and emailed a bunch of feminist bloggers to alert them to it. Yeah – he’s soliciting letters of support from feminists, in an effort to influence his sentence. Mm, that’ll go well:
Recognizing what I feel to be my responsibility as a male ally to feminism, as well as a decent human being, I ask that any women reading this letter who wish to share their responses contact me via email at firstname.lastname@example.org. I welcome your questions, concerns, feelings, and anything else you would like to share. And I would especially welcome your thoughts on how I might move forward in my life with respect and compassion toward women.
Snippets from those who have responded:
Lastly, stop identifying with feminism. Just stop. Of all of your crimes, this certainly ranks among the least severe. But you are not a feminist. You are the farthest fucking thing from an ally I’ve ever seen. Again with the male entitlement. You claim to want to work for your welcoming back into the feminist community and yet still call yourself a male ally and still think that after sexually assaulting a woman you can “identify with feminism.” That’s not working. It is your privilege showing in manifestly repulsive ways. Stop this charade, and stop making it all about you. It’s insulting not only towards feminists as a group but to every individual woman who you have victimized throughout the course of your assault, lies and emotional violations. Just. Fucking. Stop.
Fuck you, buddy.
You are the worst kind of shithead.
You are a shithead in wolf’s clothing and that’s infinitesimally worse that your garden-variety shithead.
Shithead by night.
Shorter Kyle Payne:
“I don’t know what came over me, the Patriarchy made me do it. I am so very, very, humbly sorry. Please tell me how I can be a better ally from here on out.”
God, you’re a snivelling little turd, aren’t you? And, no, “sorry” does not cut it – not anywhere close. “I hope she knows, with utmost certainty, that she did not deserve to be treated this way.” Of course she bloody knows that, you patronising egomaniac, that’s why she pressed charges. Every woman knows that they don’t “deserve” to have their breast exposed and filmed by a sexual predator whilst they are unconscious. The fact that you feel the need to explain this tells us a lot more than you’d probably like us to know about your attitudes to women. Need protecting, do they? Can’t do this feminism thing on their own, so need a few nice, trustworthy men to come and help out with the cause? Wrong, Kyle. Just plain wrong.
“My reputation as a pro-feminist activist and an advocate for survivors has been seriously, and quite possibly irrevocably, compromised.”
Damn right. Get out and stay out.
“And I would especially welcome your thoughts on how I might move forward in my life with respect and compassion toward women.”
Oh good grief, WORK IT OUT FOR YOURSELF! It’s not our job to teach you how to treat women like human beings, for fuck’s sake. It’s obvious you have problems in that area, but your arrogance and presumptuousness are astounding (and indicative of your problem). Okay, well here’s a start for you: stop being so arrogant and presumptuous. You are doing it now, in this pathetic missive, and you did it to your victim, when you handled her unconscious body and filmed her, okay? You need that pointing out? Well, there you are, free of charge, tip number one from Debi on how to behave towards women as though they are human beings. No need to thank me.
“Without the trust that other survivors and other activists had shared with me, a trust that had sustained me and helped me clearly see that there was good in the world, I felt that there was nothing left. I wanted to die. Fortunately, it was a select few of those compassionate souls who helped me remember what real hope is all about. In the words of Vaclav Havel,
Hope is a state of mind, not of the world. Hope, in this deep and powerful sense, is not the same as joy that things are going well, or willingness to invest in enterprises that are obviously heading for success, but rather an ability to work for something because it is good.”
Dude, you’re emotionally blackmailing the feminist community here. “I wanted to die” – oh, we’re the horrible ones, because we made you feel bad. How about we make it up by telling the judge to go easy on you?
You didn’t lose shit, Mr. Payne. You threw it away. If you’re feeling suicidal, get help, but it’s not incumbent on feminists to walk on eggshells for you.
Smear campain? Waa waa waa, poor Kyle, those (mostly) WOMEN bloggers were soooo mean and unfair to you! Listen, you fucking moron asshole, YOU VIOLATED that woman. Period. End game. Who is to blame? YOU! Got it, jerk? YOU. I hope to ALL that is sane or holy YOU pay for it. You have NO place in feminist spaces, no place where victimized women might be, no place speaking for or with us, you stain. YOU are a predator, got it? Did you even notice those “Prominant bloggers” were, from me, the pro-porn sex worker, to the MOST radical of feminists?
Did you fucking learn anything???? Here’s a hint, Kyle…women do not want or need lying sack of shit “allies” like you….get it?
And if you really want to immerse yourself in his piggishness, here’s his introductory vlog – posted last month, well after he assaulted the unconscious woman in his care.
“I invite your comments, and hope that we can have a dialogue”.… Comments are moderated. Ratings are disabled. Yeah, I’m feeling really welcome.
Edit 4 August 2008: And now he has pulled that video (and no other), and is watching this thread. Way to go, Payne, on convincing the feminist community that you’re truly sorry, and not just trying (and failing) to control your coverage.