OK, “What the fuck, Catholic Church?” is like shooting fish in a barrel. But here it is, anyway. The next instalment in my “What the fuck?” series.
Roman Catholic doctors and cardinals are wetting their pants with glee over the fact that an 85 year old chemist who contributed to the original synthesis of norethisterone has now “confessed”, “recanted”, or whatever the fuck else ridiculous verbs they’re using.
Apparently this chap, Karl Djerassi, almost single-handedly reduced the Western World’s birthrate, leading to “demographic catastrophe” and “Austrian national suicide”. If only he had never lived! If only he’d been aborted! Wait, that’s not what they meant! *heads explode*
From the Guardian: “Church grabs chance to attack birth control pill”
Djerassi outlined the “horror scenario” that occurred because of the population imbalance, for which his invention was partly to blame. He said that in most of Europe there was now “no connection at all between sexuality and reproduction”. He said: “This divide in Catholic Austria, a country which has on average 1.4 children per family, is now complete.”
He described families who had decided against reproduction as “wanting to enjoy their schnitzels while leaving the rest of the world to get on with it”.
The fall in the birth rate, he said, was an “epidemic” far worse – but given less attention – than obesity. Young Austrians, he said, were committing national suicide if they failed to procreate.
Newsflash:
Women no longer incubator-slaves.
Women consuming delicious schnitzels, leading to both Teh Fat and non-mothering life.
Patriarchy does not approve.
Imminent death of lifeasweknowit predicted.
White Catholics sitting in the corner muttering “We TOLD you so. NOW look what you did.”
Church declares war on schnitzels, No, wait, the Pill. No, wait, women. What the heck – how about all three?
What. The. Fuck.
Categories: gender & feminism, religion
This my axiom, by me, which is mine 
Friday Hoyden: Hildegard von Bingen 
Friday Hoyden: Sister Rosetta Tharpe 
Today in ‘You can’t make this sh*t up’ because no one would believe you’ 
Hoyden About Town 
I cannot wait for the first African or Filipino or South American pope. Not that it will make me like the Catholic Church any better, or make them a better organisation, but maybe they’ll stop running around trying to attract the “white are dying out!!!111!!!eleven!!” idiots. (The Australian Liberal Party springs quickly to mind…)
Good post, but why’d you illustrate it with a photo of Judd Hirsch?
So the delicious schnitz are an anti-patriarchy tool? Awesome
I will increase my consumption forthwith!
*passes lilacsigil some soap for the nasty Liberal infection*
He says “no connection at all between sexuality and reproduction” like it’s bad thing. Like it’s a bad thing for fertile straight partnered women, since for everyone else, it’s always been that way. What makes these women so unique they can’t live by the same rules as anyone else?
I mean, if sexuality and reproduction are disconnected for half the world’s population (just counting men), why shouldn’t it be so for the other half?
Very funny post, Lauredhel. But you forgot to mention that a big contributor in the increase of schnitzels’ consumption by women, leading to both Teh Fat and non-mothering life (LOL!) was “The Sound of Music”. Remember?
THEY SHALL NEVER TAKE MY SCHNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITZEL!
Huh? Reduced birth rate is a *bad* thing on this overpopulated, slowly dying planet? These people really have exchanged their brains for a bible, haven’t they?
This comes the day after I was looking for a new doctor and was asked by his office assistant if I took birth control pills. When I said I didn’t, she said, “Because if you wanted to, he doesn’t prescribe them.” I was stunned. “What, is this for personal reasons?” as if I didn’t know the answer. “Yes.” “Then no, I do not want to make an appointment with him.”
I will not kill teh inkling of teh potential of teh babiez!
What the fuck, Catholic Church, indeed.
I’m astounded that there are GPs who won’t prescribe the pill. Abortion I could possibly understand.
On the other hand, the falling birth rates are a real problem in the long term. I propose making it compulsory for all girls to have had 3 children prior to completion of school. That should solve things nicely.
I’m so confused. What is their actual point?
Well traditionally schnitzels are made of veal which is fair game for being ethically unsupportable because of what they do to the poor little calves (unless you deliberately search out ‘rose veal’ which is the cow friendly, non-crate version) so I personally wouldn’t have an issue with the Catholic Church announcing a war on schnitzels.
War on The Pill is just b*ll*cks though…
Deus Ex Macintosh’s last blog post..You bombed it, you bought it…
Relatedly, I took the New Year feminist challenge and called all my local pharmacies to see if they carried E.C. Medsave Family Pharmacy did not. The rest did, except I got two who said they only had one left, and another volunteered the price–$42.
the crystal shard – is that a general New Year feminist challenge, or something you challenged yourself to do? And do you know if there’s a specific place to post your results?
It’s really funny to hear of the Catholic Church supporting a gripe that sexuality has been divorced from reproduction, when thoroughout its history it has been trying to divorce its own clergy from sexuality! 🙂
I met Djerassi once! I’d planned to buy him a thank-you drink, but he was such a pretentious tosser I didn’t.
Schnitzel is only the breadcrumbed edge of the wedge. They’ll be after your beer Maß next.
I cannot wait for the first African or Filipino or South American pope… maybe they’ll stop running around trying to attract the “white are dying out!!!111!!!eleven!!” idiots.
Hm. The Earth is warming; whites, who are poorly adapted to the heat are dying out. Maybe they are afraid more people will believe in evolution.
I found it at Feministing who linked to F-words:
http://f-words.blogspot.com/2008/12/project-for-tomrorrow.html
Feministing turned it into a project for all feminists to do in the New Year, but no one as yet has set up a place to give the results as far as I know.
Thanks 🙂
I might set that up myself, if it hasn’t been taken already!
@Chris Clarke: Judd Hirsch? I thought that was Ron Silver!
And, “Schnitzel is only the breadcrumbed edge of the wedge” is my new phrase of the week. I will use it even when it doesn’t apply–but then, when doesn’t it, really?
Tummy full of schnitzel – take that Catholic Church!
Another non veal supporter here, so won’t be eating schitzel any time soon…
But awesome post. Poor poor wittle catholics. Vexatious subjects using sexuality for pleasure rather than procreating *tsk tsk* But what, you say….men have been doing this throughout the ages???!!!
I should have pointed out that mine were chicken schnitzels. I’m a carnivore but I draw the line at eating baby animals.
whites, who are poorly adapted to the heat are dying out.
I thought it was intolerance to UV radiation, not heat in general. Love to be educated, though.
I should have pointed out that mine were chicken schnitzels. I’m a carnivore but I draw the line at eating baby animals.
I don’t know – a week of suffering versus a few years… and what with selective breeding, chickens aren’t usually more than 12 weeks old at slaughter anyway.
True Amazing Kim. I can’t claim it’s rational thinking.
At this time in the morning, that’s completely understandable.
*pillow over head*
So schnitzels are anathema but contra the Devil Drink I don’t think beer is under any threat, the church is devoted to both drinking and gambling in its licensed clubs here in NSW.
“whites, who are poorly adapted to the heat are dying out.
I thought it was intolerance to UV radiation, not heat in general. Love to be educated, though.”
That’s my understanding too. And what with these new-fangled “clothes” and “sunscreens” all the young kids are talking about these days, I wouldn’t have actually thought it much of an issue.
Also, I have to point out, as I’ve been doing a great deal of reading about the Popes in the last couple of weeks, that they were largely very supportive of people in colonised Africa and South America, which righteously pissed off the colonial powers. Of course the whole thing is entirely problematic ineleventy-three different ways, but my impression is that the papacy *as an institution* has been all for millions of new small Catholics of whatever colour.
I’m an Austrian and I just found out about this story here (via Shakesville). How sad is that?
Anyway, posted long (very long) response on my own blog, if you want to swing by. 🙂
As the world population soars to ever more unsustainable levels of ludicrous idiocy; as we careen headlong into environmental catastrophe as a result of our overpopulation; here we have someone from the country that gave us Hitler implying none-too-subtly that it is a catastrophe for white European people to not be procreating as tragically-fast as the third world, who have an unpleasant propensity to be decidedly less white and Aryan… Jesus F Christ
I’ve been inspired… today I’m going to go to the farmer’s market and buy some free-range veal for schnitzel.
Deus Ex Macintosh’s last blog post..Bail-Out fatigue hits Britain
The one good aspect, to me, is that it was declared up front, before you got into the office. However, there was absolutely no need to invade your privacy in order to do this: a simple statement, without the questioning up front, would be sufficient. Not only because of the intrusiveness, though that’s part of it – I _don’t_ take birth control pills, but I would want to refuse a consultation with that doctor.